Why am I Voting Democrat?

Ok I hope you all know that I really didn't vote Democrat..(I DID get to vote this year! Crazyy!) BUT I was reading this and it made me laugh.. I thought, considering the stupidity of America yesterday that we could all use a good laugh. :) So if you want a good laugh-read on!

Why I'm Voting Democrat
Any questions?

I'm voting Democrat because English has no place being the official language in America .

I'm voting Democrat because I'd rather pay $5 for a gallon of gas than allow drilling for oil off the coasts of America .

I'm voting Democrat because I think the government will do a better job of spending my money than I could. Redistribution of the wealth is a good thing.

I'm voting Democrat because when we pull out of Afghanistan and Iraq , I know the Islamic terrorists will stop trying to kill us because they'll think we're a good and decent country. We'll just sit down and talk to them.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe people who can't tell us if it will rain in two or three days, can now tell us the polar ice caps will disappear in ten years if I don't start riding a bicycle, build a windmill and inflate my tires to proper levels.

I'm voting Democrat because it's alright to kill millions of babies as long as we keep violent, convicted murderers on death row alive for 20 years or commute their sentences to be rehabilitated into society.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe businesses in America should not be allowed to make profits. Businesses should just break even, that's all they need, and give the rest to the government so politicians and bureaucrats can redistribute the money the way they think it should be redistributed.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe guns, and not the people misusing them, are the cause of crimes and killings. Baseball bats and umbrellas may need to be outlawed too.

I'm voting Democrat because when someone with a weapon threatens my family or me, I know the government can respond faster through a call to 911 than I can with a gun in my hand. I can talk to them while waiting on the police.

I'm voting Democrat because oil companies' 10 cents profit on a gallon of gas are obscene, but government taxes of 27 cents on the same gallon of gas are just fine as a means for redistribution of the wealth.

I'm voting Democrat because I believe three or four elitist liberals should rewrite the Constitution every few months to suit some fringe element that could never get their agenda past voters. Washington needs to consult Hollywood to determine the exact meaning of the Constitution.

I'm voting Democrat because illegal aliens are not criminals, are not sucking up resources through government aid, hospital services, education, or social services, but are just people trying to make a better life by coming to America illegally. We can't blame them for that, can we? We need to have more tolerance of those illegal aliens who are forced to commit crimes in this county too.

I'm voting Democrat because I can now marry whatever I want, so I've decided to marry my Prius Hybrid.

I'm voting Democrat because Obama's past association with Reverend Wright, Bill Ayers, ACORN, and Tony Resco are just incidents of his youth that require complete understanding by all people.

Funny eh?
I thought so.. anyway hope it made you laught. It sure did me!